You know you've been in Recession Ireland for too long when...

The media has been screaming about the young Irish leaving the country and Eire potentially losing a whole generation. In the past couple of weeks the highest search engine entry leading here has been the one describing the ways foreigners would know they've become accustomed to this place. Recently, it seems, a lot of Irish people are wondering if they've been here for too long...

So the public shall get what it wants:

You know you've been in Recession Ireland for too long when...

- When comparing supermarket receipts and queueing outside Lidl at 6am just to get a €1 special offer pack of sausages, is the meaning of life for you.

- You've substituted that ridiculously expensive bottle of wine with a liquid used for cleaning floors

- Your educated opinion of the current political atmosphere boils down to 'they are all bastards'

- You have fallen out with all of your friends working for the opposite sector and think public/private workers should be all slaughtered just so you can keep another per cent of your wages.

- You are scared to tell your friends that you are going on holidays to Brittas Bay, in case they get jealous.

- Your children are completely out of control due to not getting their weekly €100 toys, and you realise that now you actually have to spend time with them!

- You got yourself a new phone number just so you don't have to talk to all the people looking for money for your bills.

- You plan on telling your future grandchildren about the good old days when champagne was considered breakfast and cocaine lunch